Dyslexia.

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A developmental reading disorder is a reading disability that occurs when the brain does not properly recognize and process certain symbols. It is also called dyslexia.

Wow what a freaking definition, okay well it’s different things to different people actually and has a few other effects besides just reading, hell reading the definition, I feel like I shouldn’t even be able to write. Let’s start with its not just a reading disability dyslexia can effect spelling, writing, and even speaking. I’ve read signs don’t always present themselves as early reading and spelling skills are concerned, it is when complex language skills and grammar are introduced things get all wonky. It becomes a social disability, before I truly understood what it was I had, I was scared to read aloud, but worried I would speak incorrectly or jumble words together while reading something effected my self esteem. I also read “dyslexia can also make it difficult for people to express themselves clearly. It can be hard for them to structure their thoughts during conversation” that statement couldn’t be more true it sometimes happens here in my writing. sometimes my brain works faster than my fingers other times I’ve rehearsed what I wanted to say so much I forget it, lose a whole train of thought.

It’s a lifelong condition I won’t outgrow it… And I’ve said this before but I learned to hide it so well from every single person that knows me, it was almost a relief to find out I actually had something and wasn’t just slow, or lazy. Dyslexia affects my short term memory dates and days can blur together attention to detail is a serious chore for me as memory is concerned I could learn you name see and talk to you a few times and still not be able to put a name to a face. So I promise to all my exes if I mixed details up it wasn’t me (laughs it really wasn’t though)

So how do I compensate for it? Man it’s 50% mental for the years of my life (after the episode when Theo found out he was dyslexic) I just refused to believe I couldn’t beat it, I had gone so long hiding it, to accept it back then well I couldn’t wrap my head around I knew, I liked to write, could not stand math, and I could read even if it meant I had to re-read a few times to get the point, so I flew with that and again lifelong condition there is no wrong way to deal with it. I even feel hiding it so adamantly helped me train myself.

What they say and I just love to hear about people with dyslexia is that we are more creative most likely because we have to think outside the box and many still go on to be entrepreneurs gives me hope that I will be the next Richard Branson, there are so many ideas in my head that are just so hard to get out and make since but I’ve latched on to one in the last few years just need the capital to make it happen so lottery win, I await ye.

But that’s what dyslexia is to me and it’s different to any others that have it, different symptoms other ways to cope. Lastly I read we can easily lose motivation or get frustrated often I don’t want to say easy and give up. Writing is part of my motivation I feel one of my creatives talents and readers are my motivation I wanted to start a YouTube page and speak these things maybe become famous but really writing it is the best way I can explain what I feel so I don’t have to get lost and do take after take to get it right. -Vonte

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